The "Make-Me-Forget-What-I-Was-Saying" Look.

The "Make-Me-Forget-What-I-Was-Saying" Look.

   5:31 PM       Laura

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["How in the... " I trailed off, trying to clear my head, get my bearings. "How did you get over here so fast?" 

"I was standing right next to you, Bella," he said, his tone serious again. 

I turned to sit up, and this time he let me, releasing his hold around my waist and sliding as far from me as he could in the limited space. I looked at his concerned, innocent expression and was disoriented again by the force of his gold-colored eyes. What was I asking him?]

I remember one day when Steph, Alex and I were driving Ben home, and I grabbed the Twilight book off the back seat of my car, and very funnily read these paragraphs out loud.  The boys made fun of the last couple words "was disoriented again by the force of his gold-colored eyes.  What was I asking him?"  In fact, every time a question was asked after that, Ben would turn around and say, "I'm sorry, your intense eyes made me forget what you were asking.  What did you say?"

This phenomenon which I've titled, The "Make-Me-Forget-What-I-Was-Saying" Look, does happen in real life...  most guys just don't understand.   And its different for each girl...  it takes a different look, a glance, a facial expression to disorient a girl.





I shall refer most of you back to This post:  And we're going to skip to the end of the post, and interject something in the middle. Shortly after the "we went to get food at pizza port."

If you remember from my post, I was a little confused as to why Chris was still holding my hand, well after the planned prank had ended.  I had been noticing little things for days, but hadn't put together the fact that he, well, liked me.  (There is a need for a little background here..., and one day, when this is All official, I will tell the entire story... cause there's alot more than what's put up... )  Anyway.  Right before London, and actually, while Danny was camping in the living room doing final projects, I wandered down the stairs with a confused look on my face.

Laura: Danny, Chris is acting weird.
Danny: *doesn't look away from computer screen*  Funny weird? Or Funny Hilarious?
Laura: Funny nice.
Danny: *looks up*.
Laura: He's like, inquiring into my mental wellbeing... he's apologizing for things in my life that don't have anything to do with him, or isn't his fault... He INVITED me to his Grandparents house...  I guess its weird.. but its different.

I guess, if I had been looking for it, these were signs of interest and concern.  I wasn't looking for it though... I thought it had been made clear months earlier that he was not interested in me. (and again, someday, I'll tell this story...)  However, these actions were re-igniting my interest in him... (makes you wonder what exactly happened over the last 5 months. )

I thoroughly enjoyed walking around Disneyland, pretending like I had someone desperately in love with me, but the whole time, I was actually considering it.   What would it be like... to be in a relationship with Christopher?  I had entertained the idea earlier in the year, (briefly, till the idea was smashed on rocks) and was reconsidering it.  This involved me studying him for long periods of time when he wasn't looking at me, and getting lost in thought. Then, he'd turn around and look at me, I'd shake myself out of it, he'd give me a weird look, and we'd be off.  I did it several times, that I knew I was confusing him every time I did it.

So, we went to get food. During which I did one of my moments again.  Which Chris caught as soon as I started doing it.

"What are you doing?! You keep doing it!"

I giggled and inquired what he thought I was doing.

"I have no idea... tell me what you're doing. "

He moved closer to me, and semi cornered me against the wall behind me.. (we were waiting for food.)  During this moment, he was studying me.  I could tell.  We made eye contact, and he was smiling.  It wasn't a normal Chris smile, it was a rare smile that I only see when he is thoroughly enjoying himself.  In fact, I believe this was the first time I saw this smile. (A smile, which, when I replay the moment in my head, gives me chills.)

Actually, no.  I saw it the night before in the hotel... I was falling asleep, and had my eyes closed for a little while, and I opened them part way to see Chris looking at me.  I freaked a bit.

Laura: Are you watching me sleep?
Chris: A little.
Laura: My face is definitely not all that interesting.
Chris: Not true. *Rare and special smile*
Laura: *falls back asleep*

Anyway, I only saw this smile after that point 2 more times, and both had to do with me. Anyway.  REstating what I said before:  He moved closer to me, and semi cornered me against the wall behind me.. (we were waiting for food.)  During this moment, he was studying me.  I could tell.  We made eye contact, and he was smiling.  It wasn't a normal Chris smile, it was a rare smile that I only see when he is thoroughly enjoying himself. During this moment... I really couldn't breathe.  I couldn't.  I remember reflecting on this when the moment was over.  I'm pretty sure I got out "I. .uh.. " Somehow, even though I couldn't breathe. What was he asking me?   Then his food was done, and the moment was over.  I was suddenly able to breathe again. I'm not lying, and no, I haven't read twilight recently other than those few paragraphs.

Moments like this happen...  Boys, you really don't know the effect you have on us, or how quickly you can over the edge into our own personal fantasy world.  Intense stares, looks of love, or looking extremely hot can push us past that boundary, to the point, where all we want to do, is just stare at your face all day long.

It wasn't the first time it happened.  I can think of a few people who have done this.. but only a few.. like.. 3 people out of the thousands of people that I know.  And HOLY crap.. I remember what it was like to have this experience happen, when I was in love with someone, and that someone who I loved, kissed me in the middle of it.  Its like Ecstasy for a girl's brain.

Now I'm all excited again... :D

16 days.