Safe
As of right now, I'm taking control of my life. I'm giving off several impressions that are not particularly true.
I am capable of taking care of myself, whatever it looks like. I may look like a pathetic piece of work while crap happens, but crap has happened for a year, and I've done everythig myself with the support of my friends. Being "saved" inflicts on some of my core beliefs... Specifically, not burdening or inconveniencing others. Unless I know the extent of caring from the person doing it, i won't let anyone take care of Me when I'm sick.
I need to stop giving off the perception that my life is horrible. I talk about the bad stuff, mostly cause I learned from it. But right now. A better description for my life is mundane. I really don't have a place, people to belong with. And sometimes I fear to be myself. and I'm tired of it
I'm tired of not having control over things. I used to be in control. I used to he in the center of everything, and I liked it there, and now I'm not, and there's nothing I can do about it, so I need to find another place.
This would be easier if I had my own place.
I'm going to rewrite my 101 in 1001 and then I'm going to do it. And everything on it is going to progress me forward. I need a project. I think that's my problem. I don't have anything going for me other than watching myself lose control of everything.
And I'm not letting rejection destroy me anymore.
Thank goodness for blessings, and for the spirit of motivation.
I want feedback. Tell me, to you, who I am. If you were to tell someone else about me, what would you say? And I want feedback. I want to be better. And I want your ideas.
Gimme.
1 thoughts :
An anonymous tip from someone who used to know you:
You're a wonderful girl who tries really hard to go out of her way to help everyone around her. Who is smart, kind, and caring. Driven to always be doing something, striving to never lag behind anyone else. You're accomplished in many ways, yet seek to always do better. You desire to serve others, and have a great amount of self-esteem in yourself, though sometimes your care for others can drag you down (others get depressed, so do you; others experience difficulties in their lives, they hide it, you feel with them anyway).
Overall, you're a very remarkable woman.
Something to always remember (for we all experience the up and downs in life, and I don't know where are currently): as a daughter of God seeking after righteousness, that beauty shines from within. When the external and internal shine together, it's simply amazing.
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