[Quotes from Improv Night]
Jillian: What would happen if Laura and Kristen were lesbian?
Laura: Our nights would be so fun! ... i mean. wait...
*everyone looks at her *
*freaks out *
I meant.. like we'd be up giggling... oh shush, we'd be doing the same thing if we were roommates.
Kristen: I WILL have sex before I die
Laura: ME TOO!
Ben: Heck yes, I will join this club.
Kristen: We are side to side.. But not heart to heart...
* Stephanie starts trying to put her heart next to kristen*
Kristen: no.... no..
Kristen: * reads paper * Life was evil to me as a child.
Kristen: Now that you are dead, I will say this... * opens paper * If you die I will harvest your organs.
Ben: This couch is coushy, stylish and attractive.
Alex: Sounds like someone I dated.
Ben: You like kids with cancer don't you?
Jillian: No Laura, We don't burn stuff while wearing them.. there's just some stuff you don't burn.
Laura: * opens paper * You know, in ancient rome, that was part of the marriage conrtract.
Stephanie: Hurry, get into the safe!
Laura: And the password is...... * opens paper * I used to be black
Safe: Code accepted... hooray!
Stephanie: I didn't know there were surgeries for that?
Alex: I like his driving
Jillian: Does it turn you on?
Alex: No, it turns me to the left.
Kristen: Was she sexually harassing you?
Alex: I don't know if she was.. i'm 5! I don't even know what fishing metaphors.
Ben: *reads paper* Say something Saucy!
Kristen: *reads paper* once there were 2 muffins!
Kristen: That's my butt you're looking at cause I don't have a boyfriend. I have to make one up. And I frequently get this comment * reads papers* I wonder if she knows.....
Ben: I have a poem to say to you . Its a really nice one * reads paper * come swim in a blue lagoon.
Laura: Yes, I will marry you.. after I push you off the SWKT.
Alex: * pretending to fall * I have one thing to saaaaaaaaay: *opens paper* faaaaaaaaaaaaail.
Laura: This was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. There were supposed to be fireworks, and and people... and *opens paper * there's a pirate behind you!
Jillian: You ruined everything
Stephanie: Like what?
Jillian: Like my mom
Stephanie: I ruined your mom?
Jillian: Why did you die? I was going to get some.
Steph: I was pretending to be drunk.
Steph: I've only had one boyfriend
* looks at alex *
hi.
Jillian: You know what my mom used to say before she tucks me in?
Alex: Oh boy, this sounds familiar.
Jillian * reads paper * If you don't tell me you love me I'll kill you.
Jillian: I'm deft...
Stephanie: *looks up quickly* you're deaf? I can sign to you :D
Jillian: Are you un-dead yet?
Alex: That depends, are we in heaven? Because I think I'm looking at an angel.
Ben: Okay, that's it. We're getting you to the hospital!
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